My love-hate relationship.

I wish I was born in LA or NY in 1951 so I’m 16 when the first The Doors album comes out.

As though as it was I finally accepted that instead I was born in Międzyrzecz in 1994 and decided to make the most of it.

Me and Poland have a really complicated and still evolving relationship. I love her as a homeland,  her dramatic and complex history fascinates me more and more. All the glory of XVI century and the Warsaw Uprising heroes mostly younger than I am now.

On the other hand the cult of jealousy and constant complaining about issues one is able to change but just can’t be bothered to drives me mad. And that post communism overwhelming shade of grey everywhere…

Even though I’ve spent 2 years of my life in UK today was the day I voted for the first time in my life.

Side note: I realized, that if I were to do that when I first got my ID my choice would stay the same. The reasons would be different: my 18-year-old self would just like to see an ex-rock star becoming the president of Poland, the 21-year-old naively hopes for stronger economy.

(Reduction of the income tax would make me much less guilty to have the rent covered by daddy.)

Getting back to patriotism – I think I’ve built my national identity due to the contrast of what’s inside me and around me now. If I stayed there I would be writing my dissertation on Lars von Tier or Darren Aronofsky. Now it’s Wojciech Smarzowski.

It’s a typical love-hate relationship. I adore her endlessly, that dear Poland of mine, but once we get together for more than 2 weeks she makes me truly miserable. But just because we don't work togheter doesn't mean there's something wrong with her. She's a really lovely country, you know. :)



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